Being “nice” was one of the hardest habits for me to break; you know, the kind of nice where you smile, speak politely, allow others opinions to be spoken while you remain quiet, with no anger, justification, or need shown in the presence of others. My original folks valued the characteristic greatly, and as a small child it was that nature that was acceptable. It made the perfect victim for the attack of the devil, as my “nice” was taken advantage by Satan trying to destroy my physical, mental, and spiritual life by horrible manipulation of perverseness and lies. As those lies multiplied, and deeper penetration of wicked attacks permeated my life, the “nicer” I became, hoping upon desperate hope that if only I were “nicer” I could have a normal life like normal kids.
As a young adult, I stayed “nice” even in the difficult times of sorting out the wicked attacks from the realities of my life and who God expected me to become. If I was “nice” and allowed my enemies to tell lies, then they would recognize my sacrifice and surely value my life more. If I got angry, if I suffered disappointment, I would always get “nicer” and “nicer.” My family learned that if I was “nice” then I was really, really upset. What a messed-up emotion that prevents God’s Truth and reality from those watching and gives a place for the devil to hide!
As a mature, spiritually-strong Christian that is very loyal to those that I love, I am not “nice” today. I am truthful, principled, strong, sometimes abrupt, sometimes demanding, always direct and focused upon the issues at hand. I love fervently. I AM LOYAL! Those that I love, those that choose to be in my life know that I will not betray them. But they also know that I will speak the truth, hold them accountable, and demand they rise up to a higher level of mature responsibility. No one describes me as “nice” today. I have finally become the person God made me to be, and He has removed the nature of “niceness” from me completely.
This week I was reminded of the “nice” expectations of my past when two betrayers were described as holding that nature. Good on them, and good on the person that observed their “niceness.” That lets me know with no doubt that the devil is hiding behind the cloud of “nice” once again, and I will take adequate precautions to ensure the protection, safety, and sanctity of my loved ones. Isn’t that nice?
A personal note to the one who wrote: Say you’re sorry. Instead of cleverly organizing your words to sting and try to gain an upper hand, pause for a moment. If you are wanting to talk to me, let me assure you that there is only one position that will allow communication to begin; you must be humble and listen for truth. Every scenario you have imagined is false. The things you have tried to fill-in-the-blanks to somehow support the perverseness of your husband against the truth are wrong. One day, should you be graced by God to rise again, you will know the truth. I think of that day often and sometimes I cry. I know how much tears you will shed when you realize all that has happened that was twisted into wicked lies to protect the devil’s own.
I am so sorry for you. Life has not been very kind. Your faulty thinking has been twisted into places that it should never have gone. And now, at the end of your life, there is a strong possibility that your hatred and anger toward God and me might well prevent your acceptance of His salvation and the receipt of eternal life. Even sadder, the Methodist salvation of crying out for forgiveness at the moments before death is known by your sinning husband. There is a possibility, that should he somehow get his timing right and confront his evil doings in the moments before his own death, that he can cry out to Christ and receive forgiveness for His sins. How sad would that be that he would see Heaven, while his wife was destined for eternal punishment because the hatred and lies created within her cannot recognize the truth.
Its not fair to you. Rethink your position concerning these issues before you die. Come to me alone, without wickedness, and we will talk face-to-face. You will be safe. Maybe if you look into my face, and feel the Lord in my presence, your troubles of confusion will be straightened into clarity of thought and you can finally know the truths. I love you. (Publicly published because you possibly do not receive the mail that I write)